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It's official: I'm fat.

A few weeks ago in the car, I handed something back to Gracie and she said, very matter-of-factly, "Mommy, you have fat arms."  The following week, Jonny was hanging out in the garage with Lee, and rattling off all the people he knows who are skinny:

"I'm skinny, huh Daddy?  And Austin's skinny.  And Gracie's skinny.  And Levi's pretty skinny.  And you're skinny.  Mommy's... fat."  (He whispered the last word.)

When your kids identify you as "fat"... yeah, it's probably time to do something.  Seriously - when did I become this giant lump?  How did this happen?  Okay, yes, three babies in four years will play havoc with a person's shape and metabolism, but let's be honest here... I wasn't exactly skinny to start with, I hardly gained weight with any of my pregnancies (Jonny was the max at 15lbs, and I think I only gained 5lbs or so with Levi), and I lost it quickly every time.

As of Sunday morning, August 19, 2007, I weighed 213 pounds.


So I'm doing something, and so far, it's working.  This morning I was at 207lbs.

My secret?  Well... I'm walking daily - sometimes with my neighbor, sometimes alone - and...

I bought alli.

Yes - I said it.  I bought alli.  Of course... I haven't actually taken it yet.  Truth is, I'm scared to death of it, and probably will never ingest it.  However, I'm finding their online meal plans and other tools to be incredibly useful.  I downloaded an entire week's worth of meals, and am being very diligent about planning ahead.

What I'm NOT doing is logging what I eat in any way, and I'm finding that to be immensely helpful.

When I've dieted before, I always diligently did what the plan told me and wrote down (or tracked online) absolutely every morsel that passed my lips.  The result?  I was thinking about food constantly.  Between planning the meals and preparing the meals and eating the meals and then going back and tracking the meals and trying to recall any variances from the original plan, I hardly had time to think about anything else.  With thinking about food all the time, I was hungry all the time, and it just plain sucked.

To this point, not doing any sort of food journal is proving quite advantageous.  With a little planning at the front, I'm finding it incredibly easy to stick to my meal plan without it becoming all-consuming.  I'm happy, I'm not starving - heck, about half the time the meal is more than I can eat - and I'm losing weight.

My new bento addiction has been a big help, too!

So far, so good.

The other thing I'm not doing right now is allowing myself any sort of "cheat day."  Most plans recommend that you set aside one day per week where you eat pretty much whatever you want.  I've found those days to be my downfall, as they just start the cravings all over again and I have trouble getting back to the plan.  For now, I think I'm just going to stick as closely to healthy eating as I possibly can, and try to find healthy ways to treat myself.

Which reminds me: NoPudge brownies are a gift from the gods.  I'm not kidding... if you're going to make brownies from a box, these are the best I've ever had, AND they're fat free!  Yes, yes... they still have calories and carbs and sugar - I'm not suggesting you sit down and eat a whole pan of them, but one serving is quite satisfying.  The kids love them, too.  I've been serving them with a little side of vanilla yogurt and berries.  Yum!

For now, I'm fat... but hopefully not for much longer.  Wish me luck!



( 9 comments — Leave a comment )
Aug. 23rd, 2007 04:16 am (UTC)
Good luck! I'm back on the fitness wagon myself; I gotta look halfway decent for my videos (ugh) and my child recently told me I was the "prettiest mommy she knows even with my fat tummy" (UGH). My husband informed me that I don't have a fat tummy, it's just not flat, and he's right, but it ain't flat by any means...
Aug. 23rd, 2007 07:12 am (UTC)
I've actually had success with writing down everything I eat, as I tend to mindlessly graze. Writing down what I eat, regardless of whether or not I'm tracking calories helps to keep me accountable, and more mindful of what I'm putting in my mouth.

I can't wait until I get this baby out, I'm getting an IUD and going on a SERIOUS diet.
Aug. 23rd, 2007 11:56 am (UTC)
Yeah - I think I'm just weird or something, because most people seem to do better when they write everything down. I, however, most definitely do not.

Dunno if you've made the breastfeeding decision yet or not (and no - I'm not a psycho about it, but I am passionate about it, so yeah - it's gonna come up... hope that's ok), but it is no joke that it helps you lose the post-baby weight *fast*. With all three of my kids, I lost my pregnancy weight plus about 15lbs by the time the baby was six weeks old.

Oh - and if you're nursing, don't even attempt to diet. a) you don't need to, and b) you will never be so hungry in your life as when you're nursing... seriously, the baby will look mighty tasty from time to tome!
Aug. 23rd, 2007 06:31 pm (UTC)
Oh we're definitely breastfeeding. I'm banking on that revved up calorie burn!

I probably shouldn't use the word "diet" as that's not really what I do. I just mean that I'm going to get serious about weightloss and excercising. I've felt so bulky and ponderous these last few months that I can't wait to use my body again!
Aug. 23rd, 2007 10:47 am (UTC)
Good luck! I need to do the same, myself. Old habits die hard, though! I'm also just starting to get into making bentos, so hopefully having nice healthy meals when school starts up again will help!
Aug. 23rd, 2007 11:59 am (UTC)
Thanks! And welcome to my insanity, by the way. I've added you back. :-)
Aug. 24th, 2007 05:38 pm (UTC)
But it's a good kind of insanity!
Aug. 24th, 2007 02:49 am (UTC)
I'm still working on losing the baby weight AGAIN. For the 3rd and last time...

I'm down to 184-186 about... it's coming off slowly but surely. I've banned my vices from the house (being ice cream and Oreos being the big ones). I've taken to guzzling water instead of juice (diluted juice, but it still has calories... I do drink it some but not like I had been drinking it).
Sep. 9th, 2007 12:24 am (UTC)
Good luck to you!

I wish you lived closer. I'd meet you every day for a long healthy walk! (Unless it's over 100 degress and 2000% humidity, which is when I draw the line).
( 9 comments — Leave a comment )