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What a morning!

First of all, the ice and I are decidedly NOT friends.  I slipped and fell for the second time in as many weeks, on the way into the doctor's office, no less!  I'm seriously considering locking myself in the house until the weather is consistently 50 degrees or above.

The babies look great... they're both head down right now (that doesn't mean much at 21w for a singleton, but when there's two in there, they already have less room to move around, so good chance they'll stay that way).  Sexes are confirmed... definitely the same as what was under the cut in my last post.  :-D

And finally... these babies will NOT be born in the hospital, barring pre-term labor (before 35 weeks) or some other true emergency situation.  Otherwise, HELL no.  Wanna know why?  Lemme fill you in a little conversation I had with my OB this morning...

(To note, this was not with my primary OB, Dr. J.  I'm now officially being tag-teamed by him and Dr. R., the practice's "high risk" doctor.  This conversation was between me and Dr. R.)

So we look at the babies and my cervix on the ultrasound, and everything looks great.  He actually described my cervix as "just fantastic," which I gotta say... it's a little weird, but whatever.  He finishes up the exam, sits on the stool and says, "So, what else to you want to talk about?"  Since he appears to be in no hurry, I decide to dive in.  "Well, I was hoping you could tell me a little bit about what the births will look like... I've had easy labors and births historically, and certainly have never been classified as high-risk.  This is all new, and I'm not real big on interventions."

Him: "Well, when you get to the hospital, we'll do the usual things... start the IV, get the monitors hooked up, etc."
Me: "What's the IV for?"
Him: "To give you fluids, since you won't be able to eat or drink, and so that we can administer pitocin to make sure your labor progresses."
Me: "Ok" (I decided I wasn't going to argue anything at this point, because I wanted to just gather as much information as I could)
Him: "Of course, you can almost never get a good read on external monitors with twins, so we'll do an internal monitor on Baby A."
Me: "So, I'll be confined to the bed?"
Him: "Well, you'll probably be able to get into a chair, but yeah - that's pretty much it.  And I don't know if you've had epidurals with your other babies..."
Me: "I did with Jonny - I'll never do it again."
Him: "You're going to have to this time around."
Me: "Why?"
Him: "Well, your babies are both head-down, and assuming they stay that way, you can certainly try to deliver them vaginally, but even if you manage to get the first one out, a lot can happen between delivering Baby A and Baby B.  It's incredibly likely that Baby B will have to be delivered by C-Section, and if you haven't had an epidural, there's no choice but to put you to sleep for the surgery."
Me: dumbfounded, blank stare
Him: "Look, there's really just a whole host of things that can go wrong, and we have to be prepared for all of them..."

He said a bunch more stuff, but I had all but tuned him out at that point, and was trying hard not to cry.  On the other hand, it was all just so CLASSIC "birth is scary, and you don't know what you're doing, and I'm the expert" OB bullshit that I wish I'd recorded to play it back for anyone I could get to listen.

So yeah - no way in HELL I'm walking into a hospital to birth these babies if they're full-term (or close enough to count).  Yes, here, let me walk right into your gauntlet of interventions that will all but guarantee that these babies will have the worst possible entry into this world, possibly put them at serious risk, and ensure that  I'll have a horrific recovery.  Please, I'm all about that!

Fuck the machine that goes PING!

I called Lee as soon as I left the office, nearly sobbing I was so upset.  He responded perfectly... "Baby, settle down.  We can do whatever you want."  He may be a total shit along the way, but he always comes through.  :)

Of course, he followed that with, "When exactly did you become Grizzly Adams?" and something about giving birth out back in the woods.  Yes, no serious conversation can be had without a little ribbing, but that's ok.

So, we are now on a serious hunt for a midwife.  I already have the appointment scheduled at CHOICE for 3/26, and I've left a message for Kathy Mitchell.  If any of you have additional recommendations/contact info, I'm all ears!


( 15 comments — Leave a comment )
Mar. 12th, 2008 08:04 pm (UTC)

I think the first thing that I'd do is have the support of Dr. J...arrange a time to talk to him, not the high risk guy and get his support. I know that a lot of midwives are hesitant to take on clients w/o the support of their doctor. The person you really should talk to is Beauty - she's a midwife, and huge advocate of home birth. She's no longer in Ohio, but she'll still be able to offer good advice, I bet.

It sucks that this guy has such an archaic way of thinking. Did you see the c-section rate in the US is now approaching 1 in 3??? Good lord.

that said... um, pixie and dixie??? who gave them those as belly names?
Mar. 14th, 2008 12:53 am (UTC)
I think the first thing that I'd do is have the support of Dr. J

Yes - I absolutely plan on talking with him at my next appointment. Trouble is, there are six doctors in the practice. So, regardless of what he and I agree on, there's only a 1 in 6 chance he'll be on-call when I go into labor.

Did you see the c-section rate in the US is now approaching 1 in 3???

Yep - 29.4% in 2005, to be exact. It's as high as 45% in some areas. Crazy, unnecessary, and really just sad. We spend twice as much on maternity care than any other country in the world, and yet we have the 2nd highest infant mortality rate of all developed nations. Our maternal mortality rate isn't much better.

um, pixie and dixie??? who gave them those as belly names?

Hah - belly names? That's what Lee wants to NAME them! (http://tinyurl.com/2q286b) I made him settle for using them as belly names.
Mar. 12th, 2008 08:32 pm (UTC)
My aunt and my grandmother both delivered twins without any of this monitor bullshit - quickly, safely and with a minimum of trauma. In fact, my aunt labored for less than twenty minutes between the two deliveries.

You have to do what's right and best for you. Looking back on my birth experience, I've learned so much. Unfortunately I truly was high risk and it turns out that my hospital birth was probably the safest for me. Next time I have a better idea of how to reduce my risk so that I can have a gentler birth experience.

It just sucks that they're so quick to silence you and put you on the medical conveyor belt. I hope you find a great midwife and have the homebirth that you want!
Mar. 14th, 2008 12:57 am (UTC)
Thank you.

And yes - I absolutely recognize that there is a definite NEED for hospitals and OBs and interventions when a mother is truly high-risk (as I know you were). However, I'm just not buying that I suddenly become high-risk after three completely normal births to full-term healthy babies JUST because there happens to be two in there this time around. Does the risk increase? Sure, but certainly not to "drastic measures must be taken" levels.

Oops... I'm ranting again. I'll stop it now. :)
Mar. 15th, 2008 08:48 am (UTC)
I'd be ranting too if I had a doctor say to me what your doctor said to you! Rant your heart out, I say!
Mar. 13th, 2008 12:07 am (UTC)
Mar. 13th, 2008 12:10 am (UTC)
Also, I really look forward to hearing more about your decisions. I'm trying to decide about a homebirth for the exact same reasons you stated, and even though my OBGYN's office is one of the more progressive in the city (they have midwives attending pretty much any normal vaginal birth) I'm still afraid of the typical hospital interventions. Obviously since I'm not pregnant yet, I haven't talked to the midwives at CHOICE, but I've heard good things. I'm really curious to hear what you think of them.
Mar. 13th, 2008 02:15 am (UTC)
Which OBGYN office do you go to? Because AFAIK, Prof for Women's Health and Dr Isabelle are the only ones with midwives and Prof for Women's health really stinks when it comes to intervention-free births. (I went to them for 35 weeks, and then couldn't take it any longer). Dr Isabelle fired his midwives at one point but I heard he has another one again. I heard that the best place with midwives is actually up in Marysville. I hear all the birth gossip because the AP Village ladies like to talk about it a lot. :-D

There's basically 2 choices for home births in columbus... CHOICE and Kathy (who is actually in Heath). There's some other home birth midwives a little bit further out too. I have never heard bad things about either CHOICE or Kathy. CHOICE also has good birthing classes for anyone planning a natural childbirth (@ the hospital or at home). I was actually going to go to CHOICE when I was pregnant with Greg, but their midwives were going to a conference when he was due, so they referred me to Kathy, and maybe it was fate because I really loved her, she becomes like family.
Mar. 14th, 2008 01:01 am (UTC)
I'll be sure to post an update after my consultation. I'm really excited about it. Out of curiosity, who is your OBGYN? I've been toying with the idea of changing OBs, just in case the home birth doesn't work out for whatever reason. I'd like to have an OB backup that isn't intervention-happy.
Mar. 14th, 2008 12:58 am (UTC)
Yep - had a consult with a doula there a couple weeks ago (she was nice, but we didn't really click), and will have a consult with one of their midwives next week. :)
Mar. 13th, 2008 02:21 am (UTC)
It seems when you talk to OB's they always talk about everything that can go wrong, as if it happens all the time. My cousin who is a resident (3rd year I think) is going to be an OB/GYN. Doing c-sections is no big deal for her, she does them all the time. She says that 99% of the women get epidurals, and the ones who don't, just went too quickly. I think the OBs like doing csections, because they're easy for them.

She was there for Maylie's birth (that was the year before she started med school, and I figured she would like the experience). She said that if I'd been attended by anyone else, they would've just sectioned me. Great, that's nice to hear huh.
Mar. 14th, 2008 01:06 am (UTC)
I know - it's such an ass-backwards way of thinking about things. Of course things CAN go wrong, but they just don't see that in all their valiant efforts to "be prepared," they often CAUSE things to go wrong. There's a reason the US has the 2nd highest infant mortality rate among all developed nations, and it ain't 'cause our women can't birth babies.

I think OBs like doing csections, because they're easy for them.

This couldn't be more spot-on. Not only are they easy for them, but they significantly lower the risk of a malpractice suit, because a c-section is seen as "well, they did all they could."

Have you seen The Business of Being Born? They talk a lot about this issue, and *several* OBs come right out and admit that most OBs would prefer to "just section 'em" because it's easier, and to cover their asses.
Apr. 2nd, 2008 04:53 pm (UTC)
I am really shocked at the attitude of this doctor! I just commented on your recent post on the Lactivist blog, but something about this and the earlier comments here reminded me of my visit from yesterday. We were discussing posterior position and he was giving me all the scenarios, because I'm pretty certain my little guy is facing forward at the moment. I actually brought the subject up because of concerns over "back" labor, but we also discussed issues with whether or not the baby would actually be able to get through the pelvic bone.
Of course, my doctor seems 90% supportive, except when he brings up the "warnings" about the head being too big or some other unlikely scenario. Because he's mostly positive, I know he just says these things to "cover all his bases" and I generally ignore the scare tactics, but when a doctor comes out and tells you about all the interventions they are GOING to do right from the start, it's no good!
I'm so glad you live where you actually have the choice to homebirth without any worries about legal issues. Especially since you've already given birth several times.
Apr. 5th, 2008 03:31 pm (UTC)
Hi there! *waves* I was pointed your way by mayna, who's been on my f-list for a few years now. I'm not in Columbus though - I'm down here in Cincinnati.

I just found out last week that I'm also carrying twins! My last child was an HBAC, and I was planning a similar experience for this pregnancy - imagine my shock to find out about the twins! My midwife is on board and enthusiastic about homebirthing twins, so barring preterm labor or bizarre positioning, we're sticking with the HB.

If you don't mind, I'd like to friend you. I have the feeling you and I might have a lot to talk about in the coming weeks!
Apr. 23rd, 2008 02:27 am (UTC)
I remember seeing a video somewhere of a woman delivering triplets at home, unassisted, and one was breech! If she can do that, you can CERTAINLY birth your twins at home!
( 15 comments — Leave a comment )